In the Reflection of Who's Image

Two days ago, my heart was yearning and crying out for some affirmation. My utmost deepest struggles spoke silently but heavy weight in my heart. The question that came to my mind was, "Do I have what it takes?"

I redirected my personal question to the Greater One, "Why am I feeling likes this? Why am I asking the question, if I have what it takes to run this store?" To give you a better context, starting April 1, I will be entering into another quarter in Proto's. As the season gets warmer in spring and summer the restaurant will only get busier and more exciting! And, it's intimidating me. I am scared to see the business get busier in production, or maybe I am just scared to fail.

But then yesterday, the boss sat me down for an evaluation and meeting. Her words were, "The kitchen's organization is unbelievably orderly and clean. The kitchen looks incredible! It has maintained it's ways since how I trained the staff since it opened in 2006. Not even the other 5 store in Colorado have maintained the same daily preparation like in the Boise store. Especially, when I enter in the door the staff's appearance and the cleanliness and order of the store reflects you, Caroline. Your detailed-oriented, the cleanliness, the atmosphere and how the staff reflects you. Your hard work is noticeable; it reflects in your store."

Wow, a few days ago, I was questioning all the effort I put into this store and if I have what it takes to run this place. All I ever see is my inadequacy and lackness of, though I know I have put more than a 100% of myself in this job, even to the point of sacrificing my personal time.

But more than anything, the insecure quiet-heavy voice of mine was answered beyond satisfaction. Hearing my boss say what she said has paid all the sweat and tears I've committed to this store. "Good job! Your store reflects you..." It is the highest compliment and affirmation I could ever receive.

For a second there, I was beginning to doubt my God that He is not listening..., but time after time he blows my mind away.

Now a thought comes to mind, "Who's image? Who's reflection is she seeing?" Because I know what my image is composed of. It's wretched, impatient, foolish, and lack of any skills. But I am so grateful that there is Someone who is making interventions in my life.

I remember at the age of ten, I had an aha moment and saw my personal image. I saw I was broken, messy, and a hopeless case. I remember saying to the Big Invisible Being that He needs to fill in all the gaps and cracks in my life. Little did I know that He hears me and continually answers my heart's desire to be reshape into His beautiful image.